There is this saying that, when your friends fail or are at a low, you feel bad. but when they are at the top or succeed you feel worse.
Almost every human is cut in this web of comparison when it comes to friendship and success. Our friend’s new goals and achievements, give us a hint on what to compare at.
Comparison is a stealer of joy and sanity. It drains you emotionally and limits you physically.
How to know if you are cut in the trap of comparison
- Have you ever bought stuff that you don’t need just because you want to keep up with your friends?
- are you always concerned about what your friend thinks about you,
- Whenever anything positive happens to your friend, do you get annoyed?
- Do you feel low on yourself every time you walk with your friend?
- Are you always checking at your friend just to see what he or she is doing better than you?
If you answer yes to any of these questions, you’re stuck on the web. Comparison places us in a loop where we race around and never win.
If you must win, then you have to stop comparing another’s accomplishment with yours.
Here are the ways to get yourself out of the web.
Take it as a pleasure
I have a couple of friends who are incredibly accomplished and very impressive. I’m so proud to be a friend of theirs, and I love and appreciate the time I spend with them.
I just try to take it as a pleasure that someone who I find so amazing has chosen to have me as part of their lives. I also think their impression of me must be very strong, too
Try to shift your perspective
You can be motivated by them to reach your own goals, rather than seeing them as proof that you’re not good enough. It’s almost like the other side of the coin. A successful best friend should motivate you to work a little harder on your goals. and not the other way round. When you see them, typically say to yourself, that mediocrity is never an excuse for failure. Try to always remind yourself that you are very impressed with them because they have worked hard to get where they are in life. In that way, you’re leaving no room for comparison.
Try and remind yourself that everyone’s journey is different
For whichever way they are accomplished, there are millions of ways in which you may be as well. And even if you can’t seem to think so, remember that everyone moves at a different pace in life. first to graduate from university is not always first to be gainfully employed. first to get married isn’t always first to give birth. you compare yourself to people or your close friends when you fail to see who you are and possibilities staring at you. if your friend has accomplished a lot in Educational sectors because they are intelligent, it doesn’t mean you are dumb. you just good in some other places. that they might not even dare. If you begin to see yourself in this light, the comparison spirit will disappear. just remember we are good in diverse places
Compliment and appreciate their effort
when a friend tells you about his or her new career, be impressed with them. When someone buys a new property, take part in their happiness. If anyone shares some wonderful news with you, keep your attention on them instead of turning it back to yourself. Find great and tiny ways to acknowledge the accomplishments of other people, especially your friends
Be happy for them
Another way to stay focused and stop the comparison is by being happy for whosoever is at the top of their games. Yes, there is this saying that you attract what you appreciate. if your friends are moving so fast up the ladder, be happy for them. I could be you, it’s them today and tomorrow will be yours. be happy for whatever thing they have achiever more than you
Don’t be that bitter friend, else you will end up a bitter soul. A happy soul does not compare, they just appreciate and stay happy. I have true friends, we support each other and lift each other. We are always reminding ourselves that we are all doing good, and will always be there for each other when the chips are down. By so doing we left no room for comparison as we are good at different things.
See your presence as value
All relationships offer something of value (typically if they do not they are fairly draining and or toxic). your presence is of value as well. start valuing yourself in your relationship and you will not feel the need to compare! the person whom you think has done a lot more than you have needs you too. if the person doesn’t need you he or she will quit being a friend
Be positive
I think it’s great to have brilliant friends who have accomplished a lot and at the same time encourages you. You have to consider they’re your friend and probably think you’re awesome too! Stop thinking a lot about how you feel about them alone. If they always stick with you as friends, they believe that you’re cool. Even when they have achieved more than you do.
Find your own strength
There is this potential inside of you, only you have access to it. discover yours and began to make use of it. write down things you are good at, and put up plans on how to achieve them. Do not live in other people’s shadows.
we are all humans and this comparison tendency lives in all of us. but then, there is still no justification for doing it. comparison limits us from our potentials and kills our joy. shake off that bad energy and put on a good vibe
Don’t compare your beginning with someone else finish
Don’t compare your beginning to someone else middle
Don’t compare your chapter one to someone else chapter twenty
Don’t compare your behind scene to someone else highlight reel
Having read this I thought it was very informative. I appreciate you taking the time and effort to put this article together. I once again find myself spending way to much time both reading and commenting. But so what, it was still worth it!
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